Tijuana Bible Museum: Tillie the Firewoman

Nutshell

Tillie battles the recession with duty at a fire station, but her supply of coochie trails demand and San Franciscan hijinks ensue!

Notes

From slang, 60's vintage, from a lot of 17.

Author

Unknown

Source

eBay

Pages

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Well, if it's that easy, I'm going to get some of that nice easy money. I'm just as good looking as Goldie, and I got bigger tits, and Mac says I'm pretty good fucking. I think I'll get started in the morning.

The next morning, Tillie arrives at "Gate 69."
I'll bet you could stand a little high-pressure loving, big boy.
You ain't kidding sister. Are you any good at giving head jobs?
That's one of my specials!

Tillie sets the price.
It'll cost you five--
Hey, I'll pay you ten, just keep sucking it!

Tillie takes on another of the frisky firemen.
This is goingf to cost you $20.00 to fuck me, and $10.00 if I eat you, too.
This is worth $50.00 anytime. Just keep fucking honey, I'm cominnng!

Tillie makes time with a budgie of a blaze battler.
Hey Shorty, you can only come once for $20, you know.
How about once in the asshole for another $10.00?

Tillie does double-time.
Gee wizz I can make twice as much money this way.
Oh woooo!

Tillie begins to regret her choice of career, "Ow my poor cunt is really hurting but look at all that money standing in line."
SPLAT
Come on Joe, hurry up will ya?

A line of impatient boys begin to bugger each other as a musical little fairy lists, o/~ oh you silly savage it's so big o/~ ALL ABOARD THE MAN TRAIN.

Tillie visits her friend Goldie with all the gory details, her dress torn and spattered with semen.
WHAT!! You made $12000 in one day? That's more than I make in a month. With all that money you should have bought a new dress-- yours is a mess!
Well, Goldie, It's like this--I don't get any money until the boys get paid.
Oh Tillie you are a dumb shit!